All souls

Today started off rainy, blustery and distinctly chilly.  The wind was quite strong from last night and carried on until just after noon.  It’s sunny now, but brisk, so it’s not as cold as it was.  Jerry is being extra mischievous today; he’s been hooking his claws in my new blanket and getting caught in the crochet, then he goes romping around trying to sneak food from one or the other of us.  He’s very attached to the former “fur” trim of my coat, and shakes it aggressively.  Don’s new medication arrived, and he’s been grumbling about the expense and saying that the over the counter version is cheaper.  It is, but the dose is about one-tenth of the prescription.  He’ll adjust once he tries it, I’m sure!

For the last few nights, I’ve gone in to bed, snuggled under the covers to get warm, then I fall asleep with the light on and totally unaware of that fact.  I’ll wake up 2 - 3 hours later, turn off the light, plug in my electronics and go back to sleep.  It’s funny, because I seem to have a strong urge to sleep as soon as I get into bed, but then I will sleep through to the morning.  I’ve been eating again, and the CBD oil is still sparking my appetite.  I’m still confused as to why I lost that weight, but I’m continuing to eat.  My nurse tells me that she’s coming around 8-8:30 to set up my hydration, but is often delayed until almost 10.  Shortly after her departure I’m ready to go back to sleep but I try to stay awake until closer to regular bedtime.

It’s the feast of All Souls today; yesterday was that of all Saints.  The nice thing is just spending some time meditating on “those who have gone before” and remembering beloved ones.  I don’t become depressed or maudlin, I just think about the shared stories and think about what stories I might share that would be meaningful.  As part of family time, I was speaking to my young niece last night who was quite upset because she wanted to help prepare dinner and there wasn’t anything that she could do.  I was amused at how she was annoyed that she couldn’t help with dinner and kept saying, “but I want to do something to help!”  We talked about other things and got her distracted from being upset.  I’ll be talking to my elder niece this weekend as it’s been a while since we last spoke.  I miss spending time with the kids.

I’m struggling to stay awake, so I’ll sign off and have some water.  I do feel more energetic and alert with the hydration, although it doesn’t seem to be effective until midmorning; the early morning I’m tired and dragging until I eat something, then I have a bit more energy.  Here’s hoping things improve more and soon!  Good night!