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Showing posts from June, 2021

Credo ut Intelligam

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After sleeping for 2 days almost continuously, I feel much better.  It’s amazing how transformative sleep can be!  It’s just great to not be tired all the time, even though I needed some extra time to recover this afternoon after my personal support worker came and washed my hair!!  Oh, the delight of having washed hair after a month of limited hair care!  It’s delicious.  The feeling of having my hair washed is just wonderful.  These indulgences are beyond description, aren’t they?  There are reasons why having someone else do things for you is such a wonderful thing.  I begin to understand the lure of having slaves to pamper oneself, because it’s just so incredibly luxurious!    Perhaps I will allow myself the indulgence of that once… a spa moment?  When I’m again permitted a massage, and maybe a wrap?  The decadence ! I’ve been looking at upcoming crochet projects.  So many projects, so many choices, and not enough time or yarn to do them all!  It’s like books… so many that I can’t

Deo volente

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Today’s entry will be short.  I’ve slept most of the day again, and it’s been VERY challenging to stay awake. I think at least some of that is due to the heat — it was close to 40C today! Then add in Ottawa’s famous humidity, and it was difficult for me to breathe too. I understand how hard it was for Don those days at the hospital.  It’s hotter here than in Trinidad, which I always find so strange. I did most of my routine; today: I took a walk downstairs to the car, picked up the newspaper from the lobby, took a shower, that sort of thing, then I felt asleep in my chair.  This annoyed Don a lot, because he says that it will hurt my neck, and then my back, so I have tried not to do it.  Today, though… I’m blaming the heat!  I just woke up after a delightful nap! and it’s late, so I need to take my meds and my supper and generally wake up before I sleep for the night. I’m still sleepy enough that I’ll probably sleep the night through again.  I see a conversation with my medical team ab

Concilio et Labore

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I spent today mostly asleep.  I had a wonderful visit this morning from my lay minister, who brought me communion.  It was an admitted struggle to be alert for 9:30 because my body just wanted to stay curled up in my bed and my pillow forts.  But I made it, and then when he left shortly after 10, I headed back to bed.  I contended with the question of whether to set an alarm for 11 (and my medication dose) or 12 (scheduled arrival of the nurse) and the nurse won.  However, I slept determinedly through all of my alarms, waking at 12:45 to a call asking for the nurse to be rescheduled to tomorrow, followed by a package delivery (Amazon has some benefits, apart from its appalling workers’ rights problems) and a friend checking up on me.  I got up long enough to eat, take my meds and then go right back to sleep.  My otherwise uneventful day continued with the delivery of my shower chair (O joy!  O happiness! I can shower!) and several more hours of sleep and cuddling with Jerry, who is sti

Collige Virgo Rosas

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You’re getting a small view into my role in the home in terms of my permission levels from my tiny furry dictator.  I’m taking the opportunity to show him off while I demonstrate just my life is managed!  Last night, Jerry objected to me writing my blog, and was batting me to stop writing and pay attention to him.  I was trying to finish writing, but there was a small dog who has other plans.  He’s still not supportive of the idea, but he’ll at least give me a chance… I’m still so happy.  I woke up in my  bed, with my dog on my lap, from a deep sleep that lasted for several hours without the need for drugs.  My need to sleep is still really strong, and I’m inclined to fall asleep with minimal effort.  I’m struggling with the pressure to stay awake; it’s way easier to drift off and catch up on all the sleep that I’ve missed.  We pretty much agreed that I was sleep deprived while I was in hospital, so at the moment my body is catching up with the messaging that is coursing through me for

Capax Infiniti

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It is the day!  D-Day!  Discharge day!  I’m going to run out of exclamation points soon 😂  Last night I slept for maybe 3 hours, since my newly-installed roommate was a talker, and his assigned nurse apparently worked as an 18th-century whaling ship shouter! Between them, they destroyed any hope I had of sleep, since they would start a conversation just  as I was falling asleep.  In fact, they disturbed me enough that I got out of bed and joined some of the other patients in the rec room to watch the hockey game.  (I managed to win a cup of tea in trivia 😆 and joined in some fun banter before I returned to bed as the game went into overtime.)  Any knowledge I have absorbed about hockey in the past years stands me in good use for trivia, since little Caribbean girls aren’t expected to know things like “who scored the  goal?” or to justify why Orr is a better player than Gretzky. (Just accept it; I won’t get into a discussion!) I managed to photograph a little bird in the tree by my ro

Citius Altius Fortius

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Closer, getting closer… almost all the ducks are lined up (you!  Get back in line!) as we prepare for going home. I have a test that’s going to be rescheduled because of an emergency, so it will be delayed and done as an outpatient.  It’s not a big deal, so I’m just going to wait.  I’ve ordered a couple of items that I’ll need to make things simpler and they will be delivered over the weekend.   There are some things that I’ve learned that I need to share about being hospitalized, especially during a time like this where things are unusual.  Today I’m just focussed on things that relate to managing self care and self advocacy; we’ll deal with other things another time.  Like the apples that are growing so prettily near the mosaic shed by the wishing well. Step one… talk to people.  Talk to the care team, to the support staff, to the helpers, to other patients.  The more you interact with others, the better you’re able to learn what’s happening and you’ll be more settled. Ask questions

Ditat Deus

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     Oh happy joyful! They’re beginning to process my discharge for Friday!  I’d do backflips and cartwheels except that I’ve never been able to do those even in my extreme youth and childhood. I’m just thrilled!  My palliative care team says that they are pleased with how I’ve engaged in my recovery and that I’m actively participating in planning my rehabilitation. I was explaining that I’m trying to establish a routine that I can easily maintain and support at home. Frankly, I’ll probably sleep better since I won’t be shaken awake at 6am after falling asleep at 3am and then told to go back to sleep when people are being roused for 7.  I will miss the easy access to the greenery, but it’s not worth it to stay longer.  I did some cooking in the “ Independent Living Unit ” which is a fully equipped apartment that the occupational therapy unit keeps for patients to practice returning to normalcy.  I demonstrated yesterday that I could manage in a regular bathroom, with a tub… somewhat ch

Deus Dat Incrementum.

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  Woo!  I made it to the butterfly garden 🦋 🪴 with only 3 pauses during physio!  I felt marvellous about that, I admit. Then this afternoon I walked to the mosaic sculpture, which I saw from the hill on which the butterfly garden is located. Its another volunteer run place, which normally is used for growing vegetables, but right now has flowers. It’s all part of the  Children’s Hospital of Eastern Ontario  (CHEO) grounds which are beautifully maintained to encourage walking outdoors.  CHEO is part of the Ottawa Hospital complex. I’ve spent a lot of time at this hospital over the last 9 years, and I must say that they do a good job with the artwork and the gardens which help tremendously with mental health.  I’m often inspired by the paintings at the cancer centre, particularly in the radiation units. Truly awesome.  They are of Arctic landscapes or of wildlife, and are brilliant.  I’d be perfectly happy to never see them again, honestly, if it meant that I was recovering!  But mea

cor ad cor loquitur

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  Guess what I saw today?  I was out, and persuaded my keeper to let me be outside instead of climbing stairs.  So I was able to see this baby rabbit, very trusting, on the side of the plants, munching on some roots.  I know that the therapist who looks after me had some ideas ofwhat we should be doing, I asked that I work on my goal of walking to the butterfly garden myself. I made it partway there before common sense kicked in for me. I walked uphill almost halfway before I decided to stop because I knew that if I stopped then restarting would be a risky proposition.  This paid off by being able to see young Peter Cottontail!    My afternoon session was indoors as it was raining, so I did some stairs and walked with my cane.  I dozed quite a bit this afternoon, so the day passed pleasantly enough.  I had another shower, and I was able to dress myself in my own things!   Me, Jun 21, 2021 It seems that my pain is definitely increased when there’s increased heat and humidity which is no

Cedere Nescio

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You know the expression “Into each life a little rain must fall,”?  Well, today was one of the less sunny days. Not outside!  For the last day of spring it’s utterly beautiful, with temperatures of 30C, bright sunshine and generally making me think of being on Maracas beach with some bake-and-king fish (since shark is on the endangered species list) and a beastly cold shandy.  Now that I’ve tormented myself, I’ll return to almost reality… It’s been a more than a month since I’ve been here so far, and I’m staying optimistic about being released Friday, so that is still a goal! This is another shot of the butterfly garden, where the plants are beginning to fill in. It’s still early days yet so the plants still have to cover the ground, so by the fall it will be more protected.  I understand that in the winter and early spring the ground cover stays in place to protect the limited food supply for the pollinators and related insects, so there is  dead plant matter that remains until the we

Caetera desunt

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I went to the butterfly garden today as my outing   Thar was my grand gesture, as I’m technically not allowed off the floor, never mind outdoors on a Saturday when most of the therapists are off duty.  My afternoon session was just a loop on the floor, far less fun than being able to go out exploring.  I’ve been trying to get these to work all afternoon with limited success, but maybe it’ll allow me to use two different angles.   The flowers are all designed to attract pollinators, primarily butterflies 🦋 but also bees and wasps  it will take a long time before they are back in their numbers but it’s definitely worth adding flowers of all types to attract pollinators. The orange ribbons are to honour the memories of the  215 children  found in the BC residential school.  I have no words for this, and I’m beyond horrified that this happened.  I admit that I don’t know much about the specific details of what happened at residential schools, nor do I understand the thinking behind their

bono malum superate

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We’re starting off with a cloudy morning morning, which may affect the day.  My morning walk (500m!!)  was outside, which was lovely!!!  I easily doubled my distance from yesterday, and extended it, so I was able to make it a further walk than before.  I had a lovely stroll around the grounds, and part of my goal for next week is climbing the hill to the butterfly gardens .   The plan is to be able to take the Jerry dog out for walks, which includes hills and uneven ground.  Both he and I are looking forward to that! (Well, he will be when I can take those walks!). Then I gave myself another long walk this afternoon as it rained heavily, so the walk was indoors but 45 minutes long.   This afternoon was a long walk through the connecting tunnel between the rehab centre and the General hospital, into the radiology area which is is known for confusing patients. I managed to stroll a long distance, which covered most of the area from rehab to radiology and back. In all, I think that I mana

beatus homo qui invenit sapientiam

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arcanum boni tenoris animae

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This title I’m definitely leaving for you to research yourself, but I hope that you agree that it’s having good friends Today was another bouncy one… I was in pain that was higher than normal, and we can’t find a cause. I’ve been moved into isolation again while they test me for everything.  I’ve already tested negative for Covid, C. Diff, MRSA, etc. We did  another Covid test, because it’s apparently fun sticking swabs up my nose! And that’s less than a week since my last negative result.  Meanwhile, I continue with some dreadful diarrhea. On the positive side, I walked 100m outside !!  In the open air! See the picnic table in the photo?  I walked there and back into the building!  There’s a slight incline, so I walked up and then back down.  All very exciting.  I’m in isolation again, but I overlook the little copse where I went for my walk this morning.  I saw an immature cardinal hopping around almost close enough for me to touch.  I was thrilled.  I’m of the view that my stomach i

Arare litus

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  It would be ploughing the seashore to wait for a certain response to the many questions that are burning in my mind, or to hope that we will have definite answers to all of them soon.  However, to be ready for next weekend seems more positive to prepare for my birthday next weekend.  I’m thrilled to be able to say that my release date is now June 25, 2021!  So that I will be at home for June 26, 2021! Party on, people! (The physiotherapist said that I look way  younger than my age says!  Woohoo!) My doctor gave me that glad news along with a few other happy pieces today.  The other good bits include that I do not have the dreaded C. diff. Bacterial infection, which is a plague on hospitals and I can return from isolation tomorrow 😆😃.  I admit that I was happy to have a break from going down to physio today, but all is meant was  having the training in my room instead… they continued anyway.  So no escaping for me.  It’s ok, I’m looking forward to being able to walk by myself like