Citius Altius Fortius

Closer, getting closer… almost all the ducks are lined up (you!  Get back in line!) as we prepare for going home. I have a test that’s going to be rescheduled because of an emergency, so it will be delayed and done as an outpatient.  It’s not a big deal, so I’m just going to wait.  I’ve ordered a couple of items that I’ll need to make things simpler and they will be delivered over the weekend.  

There are some things that I’ve learned that I need to share about being hospitalized, especially during a time like this where things are unusual.  Today I’m just focussed on things that relate to managing self care and self advocacy; we’ll deal with other things another time.  Like the apples that are growing so prettily near the mosaic shed by the wishing well.

Step one… talk to people.  Talk to the care team, to the support staff, to the helpers, to other patients.  The more you interact with others, the better you’re able to learn what’s happening and you’ll be more settled.

Ask questions of your medical team.  Both questions related to your care and general conversation. Ask about their weekends, their dogs, their families.  It helps to build rapport and encourage dialogue, which also strengthens your ability to raise difficult topics.  If you’re more at ease having casual conversations, you’ll be better able to talk about things that are perhaps more delicate.  For myself, that translates into asking the medical team to talk about their plans for my treatment.  It may not always be easy or direct, but it certainly lets them open up.  It also lead into discussions on the holistic treatment of patients, where one made the effort to ensure that the person’s mental, physical and spiritual care were all assessed, which would lead to a better understanding of the issues that they faced, sometimes without their actively realizing that they were under the surface.

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Food is important.  Everyone bonds over food and how good (or bad, in some sad circumstances) it is when we share a communal meal.  So be sure that you eat well, and that you offer to share food when possible.  If you can have food brought in, please do.  Collaborate with your roommates to share a meal and bond together.  It provides a chance to laugh together and perhaps to learn more about the people with whom you’re sharing space.  Exchange recipes and ideas for meals, because everybody eats and you never know what might spark a new flavour sensation or create a bond with a new person.  Like today when I was chatting with my therapist about meals and we got on to the subject of warm sweet potatoes topping fresh, chilled spinach and feta cheese.and discussed spicing it with nutmeg.  That was also when we encountered little Peter Rabbit under the protection of El-ahrairah 😁  Notice how smoothly the conversation switched to books?  And then to movies and just how dreadful Peter Jackson’s Hobbit Trilogy is, and how he should have kept his mercenary urge in control and just done a two-part movie?

If you’re in isolation, use the time to consider your questions and your approach for when you return to the group.  It’s an excellent opportunity for you think about what works and what needs attention in your approach to life.  

People have so many interesting things to share.  Whether it’s their hobbies, work, ideas, or food, they are just brimming over with information to share with others.  I learned, for instance, that when I say that I’m from Trinidad, the response is likely to be, “Oh, my best friend is from Trinidad!” Or, “What a beautiful country!  I just loved my trip there!” Or, “I’m from <other Caribbean country>”. It’s just amazing what happens when you open up the questions of country of origin!  I’ve encountered very few people who are Ottawa born and raised, though.  Many of the people I meet moved to Ottawa for school or work, so I’m always pleased to meet Ottawa natives (even more if they’re Native!)   That being said, I know the “favourite sign” of one friend who was born here, and the hidden courtyard that another friend considers magical.  These are the things that you learn from talking to others.

Mostly, though, you learn, again that your friends are awesome, supportive people who will reach out to you and remind you that no matter how grimly you glare into the future, they will simply prod you back into a semblance of good humour or will sing at you until you give up.  Thank you, my talented and evil friend.